Sunday, October 22, 2006
What would you do if
you were upstairs sick in bed and heard your mother-in-law say to your not-yet-2-yr-old-kid "if you touch that* again I'm going to smack your hands" when you have a clear and FIRM belief in using NO physical punishment?
a.) go downstairs, grab (rescue?) kid and tell off MIL
b.) yell, "I don't think so lady!"
c.) realize that if you move an inch, you will vomit all over the place and then the whole situation will go haywire. so just wait in bed until you realize the kid has moved on to bigger and better games and is no longer being threatened and then vow to never let MIL babysit again. Then spend 2 hours asking your husband how he plans to deal with this situation. My parents are VERY clear on this situation (though they obviously believe in physical punishment given my childhood) so I figure this is for him to address.
The correct answer is C (though if I were not sick, I'm sure it would have been A)
I'm not sure what to do now. I like MIL, I really do. But seriously, WTF lady? I'm pretty sure we've discussed this in the past. I'm 99% sure because I remember a story she told me about smacking her kid in front of her mother who then smacked her back and said "don't you ever hit my grandson again" So what is she thinking? Especially threatening to smack him over something so ridiculous. Believe me The Kid has done much worse than try to play with a rock.
I'm not an indirect person or shall we say I'm not very good at sugar-coating requests or opinions - if I resolve this situation, it will go something like this:
"MIL, I understand that you have opinions on how to discipline kids and that is fine. You are welcome to have your own opinion. But here is my opinion and it is the only one that matters because he is my kid. Do not ever hit, threaten to hit, or so much as place a hand on my kid with an unpleasant thought in your mind, you will never and I mean never see him again - got it? Let me say it once more because I'm not fucking around here - you will never hit, smack, or even tap my kid or threaten to do so, are we clear?" And I'm very good at remaining perfectly calm in these situations which seems to scare people. I guess if you freak out or cry or something then people attribute your behavior to being crazy or angry or hysterical but if you are calm people really understand that you mean it and it can be a little intimidating (or something, I don't know because I don't scare myself).
For the moment I'm not dealing with it but something must be said. Gotta love the relatives.
*He was touching an unlit candle surrounded by rocks, he likes the rocks a lot. Why? Because he was probably bored out of his skull. MIL just wanted him to watch TV and wouldn't take him outside to play with balls and run around - his all time favorite activity. Why MIL didn't just move the tempting candle is beyond me - she must have told him no a thousand times that day.
a.) go downstairs, grab (rescue?) kid and tell off MIL
b.) yell, "I don't think so lady!"
c.) realize that if you move an inch, you will vomit all over the place and then the whole situation will go haywire. so just wait in bed until you realize the kid has moved on to bigger and better games and is no longer being threatened and then vow to never let MIL babysit again. Then spend 2 hours asking your husband how he plans to deal with this situation. My parents are VERY clear on this situation (though they obviously believe in physical punishment given my childhood) so I figure this is for him to address.
The correct answer is C (though if I were not sick, I'm sure it would have been A)
I'm not sure what to do now. I like MIL, I really do. But seriously, WTF lady? I'm pretty sure we've discussed this in the past. I'm 99% sure because I remember a story she told me about smacking her kid in front of her mother who then smacked her back and said "don't you ever hit my grandson again" So what is she thinking? Especially threatening to smack him over something so ridiculous. Believe me The Kid has done much worse than try to play with a rock.
I'm not an indirect person or shall we say I'm not very good at sugar-coating requests or opinions - if I resolve this situation, it will go something like this:
"MIL, I understand that you have opinions on how to discipline kids and that is fine. You are welcome to have your own opinion. But here is my opinion and it is the only one that matters because he is my kid. Do not ever hit, threaten to hit, or so much as place a hand on my kid with an unpleasant thought in your mind, you will never and I mean never see him again - got it? Let me say it once more because I'm not fucking around here - you will never hit, smack, or even tap my kid or threaten to do so, are we clear?" And I'm very good at remaining perfectly calm in these situations which seems to scare people. I guess if you freak out or cry or something then people attribute your behavior to being crazy or angry or hysterical but if you are calm people really understand that you mean it and it can be a little intimidating (or something, I don't know because I don't scare myself).
For the moment I'm not dealing with it but something must be said. Gotta love the relatives.
*He was touching an unlit candle surrounded by rocks, he likes the rocks a lot. Why? Because he was probably bored out of his skull. MIL just wanted him to watch TV and wouldn't take him outside to play with balls and run around - his all time favorite activity. Why MIL didn't just move the tempting candle is beyond me - she must have told him no a thousand times that day.
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