life, apparently

Dear GradStudent,

You really need to be more careful and more organized to be successful in this business. These types of seemingly minor errors tend to build up and be disasterous. And quite honestly, I'm starting to get a bit nervous about your contribution to this project. So please, just take that extra minute to organize and think before acting.

love, apparently

[this is a direct quote, not including "love"]

note - this is not the same student as yesterday

35. I love cheese. Cheddar, swiss, asiago, fontina, feta, parmesan, colby, goat, all of them - I love cheese.

36. I'm a bit of a neat freak - Pre-Kid I had a spotless house and car. Post-Kid it is a bit more difficult and I've adjusted (otherwise I'd be completely insane by now) but still I clean all the time.

37. I always sleep with covers. We don't have a/c upstairs and it was something like 155 degrees and 600% humidity last week but still I slept with a sheet.

38. I was the Campbell-soup-label-girl in elementary school. Remember you used to bring in soup labels and all the classes competed for who brought in the most? Or was it just us? Anyway, I cut away all the unnecessary parts of the label, put them in groups of 10(20? don't remember) and stapled each group. Fascinating, I know.

39. I have crazy hair. It is very thick and has tons of texture and body. This means my hair is always in some stage of curl. When I was younger I added product so it looked like I had a perm (I can still do it now but I hate that look) I've straightened my hair before - $75 and an hour or so later and you couldn't tell at all. The good thing is that I can get a $13 hair cut at Super Cuts (nothing super about it, I'd just like to point out) and it doesn't matter if the cut is lopsided or uneven because there is so much texture that no one could ever tell.

40. My absolute biggest pet peeve is when people eat loudly. My officemate is THE WORST. I often leave the room because he eats so unbearably loud. As The Husband once put it, "its as if he wants to hear the peach scream in terror"

41. Fall is my favorite season. I'd like to live where it is always fall. Cool mornings. Cool nights. The sound of crunching leaves under my feet. I love it. I never want to live where there is no fall. Of course, academia does not care about my weather demands and in a year from now I might have to do just that (boo hoo hoo).

42. I tend to exaggerate (oh, you already knew that - #37 gave it away)

43. I am short (5' 2") and The Kid is short (10% percentile)

44. I love coffee. I don't need it to wake up or get energized or anything. I just love the taste of it, especially really good coffee. I've turned into a bit of a coffee snob in the past few years - I'll still drink bad coffee if necessary (i.e., BestBreakfastPlace has the worst coffee. EVER. So I just add lots of cream and sugar.)

45. I hate watching movies more than once, maybe twice if there is a substantial lag between viewings but really that is enough. I already know what happens, what is the point of watching again? (Ditto for reading books.) The Husband is exactly the opposite. He'd watch the same exact movie every night for weeks at a time if I didn't freak out. I've probably seen What About Bob and City Slickers 2 25 times each thanks to The Husband.

Turns out 100 Facts is hard. Doesn't seem like much, right? But for some reason, I find it quite a struggle. My apologies if you think for example that #43 is not a worthy fact. I agree, luckily it is not called "100 Interesting Facts in 100 Days." The Husband says #19-20 is not a fact but a story. Well, the fact is that the story happened to me.

Dear apparently,
Here are results from the experiment, what do you think?
- Unwanted Collaborator

Dear UC,
As I told you before, you have to implement this measure. I suggest you re-run the study.
-apparently

Dear apparently,
I don't think it is possible to implement this measure.
- UC

Dear UC,
I already sent you a program demonstrating how to implement the measure.
-apparently

Dear apparently,
I know what the point of the program is. My point is that doing it that way
is a pain in the ass.
- UC

Dear UC,
Sometimes doing science the right way IS hard.
-apparently

[note the last 2 are direct quotes]

I watched Intervention last night on A&E. This particular show followed a 40ish recently divorced alcoholic mother and a 20ish boy living at home with his mother who steals to support his meth habit. Turns out the show isn’t all that great (so no link), but it did provoke some interesting thoughts and a brief to-be-continued conversation with The Husband. My absolute biggest fear is that The Kid will have addiction problems.

On the nature side, he is pretty much fucked (sorry for the vulgarity, I must have been inspired by this post). My father and his brother have substance abuse problems (uncle has been in jail many times and his license is permanently revoked for repeated DUIs. Nice.) My mother’s father died of liver cancer/failure, no doubt due to his lifelong alcohol addiction. The Husband and both of his brothers have had substance abuse problems (Not sure they would characterize it that way but I call it as I see it: they have, in fact, all seen a trained specialist to address addiction issues.) Their mother, more than half of her siblings, and her father all have substance abuse problems (mostly alcohol I think). See what I mean?

So, what about the nurture side? That is the question. How do you prevent your kid from being an addict? I don’t know. I mean I know a few things like don’t be an addict yourself, don’t buy drugs for your kids. Check. Check. But what else? I don’t think scare tactics are the way to go. I don’t think weekly testing is the best choice. I certainly don’t think I should do nothing but hope and deny (the approach taken by The Husband’s parents – that didn’t seem to work out now did it?) The Kid is not yet 2 years old. He just learned what an airplane and a waterfall are, so I think I have some time to think about it. I don’t know what to do but I do know that I am scared enough to do something.

edited to add: from the CSA, forgot to mention that.

There are 2 bags of herbs, 1 bag of arugula, and a bunch of shallots that you can't see.

Apparently, The Husband finds it very funny that I am posting a picture of vegetables. Or maybe he finds it funny that I am sitting around in a t-shirt from Spring Break 1994 with only one earphone listening to Jack Johnson. I don't know. I asked what is so funny and he said "everything" waving his hands like Mr Miyagi

MVFM was accepted for publication and now I don't want to work. I feel like I deserve a day (or a month) off. But I was just on vacation and I'm going to another conference in a week so I need to work. But I can't. So I'm watching TV, lounging around, blogging, about to call my sister and talk for hours. Oh well.

Completely unrelated thought - tomorrow we are attending a wedding. The Kid is an excellent traveler (really, he was less grouchy than me after our 16 hour journey home.) He is usually well-behaved when eating out or grocery shopping. But attending a wedding? I don't know about that. I'm not a big fan of kids attending weddings in general. But it is 3 hours away and our potential babysitters will either be at the wedding (one parental unit) or out of town (other parental unit), so we really have no choice. The reception will be loud and full of people he doesn't know - all probably trying to talk to him or play with him. The Husband seems to think The Kid will have a great time because he loves music and dancing. I'm not so sure.

My ears are not pierced

I didn't change my name when I got married.

This is a big deal with my extended family and The Husband's family. My family (parents and sibling excluded) just don't understand. They ask "Why didn't you change your name?" in the same tone that one might ask "Why did you run over your elderly neighbor with a lawn mower?" My reply "Why did you change your name? You are still the same person, right?" Even now, 4 years after we've been married they occasionally ask"Have you changed your name yet?" The Husband's family sort of ignored my decision. (Note, it was announced at my bridal shower, our wedding reception, and I use my name in all correspondence, our checks and address labels have my name and his name, etc). We get mail addressed to Mr & Mrs TheHusband. Even mail just for me (e.g., birthday card) is addressed to Mrs TheHusband. It drives me crazy. I honestly think that some of his relatives think it is against the law not to change your name. So I must have changed my name but call myself by my old name as a sort of nickname.

I kept my name because 1) I don't understand why women change their name. I just don't. It is very strange to me. What if all of a sudden people started calling me "Alice" instead of my name. That would be strange, right? I just got married. I didn't change gender or go into witness protection so why do I need a new name? 2) I like my name. It fits.

But now that I've seen the degree to which people just assume a woman MUST change her name - I'm opposed to name changing all together. Though apparently, I'm not opposed to changing my kid's name.

I've renamed myself apparently, the SUPERSTAR. You can call me SUPERSTAR for short.

MyVeryFavoriteManuscript was accepted. That alone is pretty exciting. But why superstar status? Because the editor wrote "You have done a terrific job in responding to the editorial comments from the first round and your paper is now exemplary in its clarity and conciseness. Bravo!"

When I read the action letter, I did a little dance and threw myself to the floor. In my office, with my officemates watching. I'm thinking about doing it again right here, right now.

I rock!

26. My favorite color is orange. My childhood bedroom was orange (not my choice) and I thought it was atrocious, but apparently it grew on me.

27. My car is a green Honda. My next car will definitely be a hybrid.

28. My favorite food …hmmm… well I could easily live on pasta. I love fresh fruit (especially white nectarines and blueberries). I often crave movie theatre popcorn (not the microwave variety). More than once I’ve gone to a movie theatre just to purchase popcorn.

29. I’m 30 (or 31, I’m terrible at remembering my age. I usually have to calculate it. 30, yep I’m 30. I missed the entire year of 22 because I thought I was still 21.)

30. Yes I liked school. In fact I liked it so much I went for 23 consecutive years.

31. I don’t know why the sky is blue – something about wavelengths and atmosphere, watch Mr. Wizard. Where do babies come from? Ask your mother.

32. My favorite sport is college basketball. I love to watch college basketball.

I started this series a long time ago but (can't think of an excuse, so just but).

I finished grad school with 3 publications. One in top tier for WholeField, one in top tier for Area, and one in IfRejectedFromTopTierInAreaTryHere-ButStillPrettyGoodJournal. I think that is pretty decent, above average I'd guess. Like the good scientist that I am, I tried to find out. There doesn't seem to be any survey on the topic (professional organization only seems to care how much money we make). Anyway.

I applied for 2 jobs that year (in addition to contacting several people about postdoc opportunities). One application was to PlaceThatWillNeverHireMeButI’llApplyEveryYearBecauseILoveThatState. They didn’t reply. (I applied again last year and they didn’t reply) The other application was to EmergingDept. I was invited for a job talk to EmergingDept and it went very well. I had a great time, I really like the vibe. I was totally myself at this interview and it felt good. I decided I could live in the city even if I was a bit frightened. I thought they would h ire me. For sure. They did not. They did like me very much apparently, and tried to get a 2^nd line from the dean but the dean said no (this is all according to the chair who told BestAdvisorEver). Things I learned:

1. When you’ve already told faculty that you applied to few jobs and you have many postdoc offers and they ask what you’ll do if offered this job, DO NOT say “hmmm, I don’t know it would be a tough choice between this job and postdoc with famous guy” That is the wrong answer. The correct answer is, I’ll take this job of course, I’d love this job. This is the best possible job ever.

2. It is not good to sit with strange old chubby guy and have a stare down. Just ask a question, any reasonable question. Options include “So, tell me about the students here” “What is the status of the dept within the college?” “Where do you see the dept in 5-10 years?” “Do faculty often collaborate or does everyone do their own thing?” “Is the new chair supportive of junior faculty?” just say anything, anything at all rather than have a 2 min. stare down.

3. Though 1 and 2 seem obvious, under the stress of endless back to back ridiculous mini interviews and the lack of an opportunity to use the restroom or get a drink of water, I have no ability to think. (And, the guy was just plain weird.)

I have no regrets about this job search. I learned a ton about how the whole process works. I had fun. I had GREAT meals. And the same week I found out that I didn’t get the job, I also found out that I was pregnant. I’ve never been so happy to be rejected!

I know this looks fake, but it is not. It is really real. And, we took a scary bus ride from the road down there all the way up to the top through many switchbacks. We passed 2 waterfalls (one was 140 meters and one was 120) as we went up. We were above them. Seriously, I was scared.



I'm taking this picture from inside our bus which was on a ferry. Yes, in a bus on a ferry.